Stress isn’t fun.
But it’s also true that it may be taking away from your attractiveness.
Trust me when I say that I know a thing or two about how stress can affect your life.
I’ve been through some ringers, and I’m sure you have as well.
But is all of that stress taking a toll on your dating life?
Is it possible that stress is hurting your ability to appear attractive, sexy, and alluring to potential mates?
The answer may surprise you.
Let’s dive into it.
In this post, you’re going to learn the answer to the question does stress make you less attractive?
You’re also going to learn 3 ways to keep stress from making you less attractive.
Does Stress Make You Less Attractive?
As it turns out, both men and women prefer partners who are ‘less stressed.’
Stressed-out women appear less attractive to men.
But it’s also true that stressed out men are less attractive to women.
But why? What’s the answer?
Well, there are a number of reasons for this.
Stress can suppress fertility, so there’s that.
But it’s also true that, where it comes to men, women may be more attracted to less-stressed-out guys because they’re more likely to have a highly functional immune system.
In other words, it isn’t rocket science.
We’re looking for mates who are fertile and healthy, and for good reason.
How Does Stress Affect Beauty?
Stress can affect beauty in women in a lot of different ways.
Stress lines can cause a person to look less healthy, and more tired.
Stress can also take a toll on your diet.
If you under-eat or over-eat, you may appear less fertile, and less attractive.
But stress can also take a toll on how attractive men are.
Stress can make men look haggard, tired, unhappy, and just generally less-healthy.
It can also impact men’s eating habits.
But there’s also a psychological component to this as well.
A man who’s stressed out also sends a powerful message.
I’m getting the crap beat out of me by life, and it’s starting to take a toll on me.
This is a lot different from the alpha mentality, which says…
“I’m creating my own destiny and in control of my own life. I get to decide and dictate my journey. I’m in charge of my own fate.”
Because of this, women can actually get away with a lot more stress (aesthetically speaking) than men.
Sometimes, when women are stressed out, it can trigger the ‘damsel in distress’ phenomenon in men, causing men to want to be helpful because they’re attracted to the woman.
But men don’t generally trigger this same effect in women.
Yes, women who are ‘helpers’ may be drawn to men who seem to need ‘help,’ but this isn’t a strategy for becoming more attractive in the long run.
For the most part, for men, succumbing to stress on a regular basis is going to be such a detriment to your attraction levels as a man that it’s probably going to have an overall negative impact on your ability to attract a mate.
Stress can even trigger a negative downward spiral for both men and women.
- You struggle to get dates
- This stresses you out
- The added stress makes you less attractive, which makes getting dates even more difficult, and the cycle repeats itself
For this reason, breaking the ‘cycle’ of stress is important if you want to max out your attractiveness, take control of your dating life, and give yourself the best odds for dating success.
But alright. Now that we’ve talked about the problem, let’s move-on and talk about the solution.
3 Ways To Keep Stress From Making You Less Attractive
1. Get Ahead Of The Stress
Stress happens when some kind of event in our life causes physical or emotional tension.
For me, procrastinating and waiting until the last minute to get things done is a major contributor to the stress I feel in my life.
There’s no way to completely eliminate stress altogether.
But we can get ahead of it by planning ahead and trying to spot problems before they become super stressful problems.
For example, if you know that a tax payment is due in a month, you should start planning how you’re going to pay it now, instead of waiting to scramble the day before to make sure you have the money.
To be honest, this is the literal definition of the word ‘work.’
Work is effort or suffering you put in now to bargain with the future, to avoid even more hard work or suffering in the days, months, and/or years to come.
2. Try To Minimize Your Exposure To Stressful Situations That Don’t Matter
Stress is going to happen.
And to be honest, avoiding stress may get you into more trouble than the stress itself.
We must be ready to face, and overcome, stressful situations in our lives.
There are no two ways about that.
But… there is such a thing as a stressful situation that you don’t need to face.
For example, if a family member regularly adds stress to your life, but doesn’t prove to be worth your resource investment, you may want to minimize your exposure to that family member.
Cutting them out to avoid stress helps you to downsize the number of non-necessary stressful situations you’ll need to face in the future.
We need to be very picky with how we spend our resources. And emotional peace of mind is most definitely a limited resource.
3. Tell Yourself “I Can Do This. I’m In Control.”
Sometimes, the best way to get on top of the stress in our lives is to change our mindset and defeat it.
This is the bootstrap mentality. Some people don’t like this approach, because it involves a lot of hard work and personal responsibility… But I’ve found it to be extremely helpful.
For example: Next time you’re facing a particularly stressful situation in your life, stand up straight, pull your shoulders back, and lift your head slightly.
Then, say this to yourself.
“I’m not going to let this situation control me anymore. I’m going to do whatever it takes to get in control of this, and I’m going to defeat it.”
Then, you follow up this statement with action… and you do whatever it takes to overcome the situation.
Check out my post on why faith without works is dead.
This usually means working hard to solve a problem. But it could also mean getting therapy, cutting someone negative out of your life, or changing habits so that this problem doesn’t rear its head again in the future.
In Conclusion, I’ll Leave You With A Quote From The Oath of Kings and Queens
The Oath of Kings and Queens is the alpha mentality code I live my life by.
And the 18th vow speaks directly to stress and anxiety about the future, and gives us the means to defeat it.
“I understand that every day is a battle… and that there is no guarantee of victory tomorrow. So I vow to live gloriously and wisely on this day of days, setting my sights on the battle before me, without losing sleep or hope to the unknown horizon.”
At the end of the day, we don’t have to allow stress to defeat us.
Set your sights on the battle in front of you right now. Don’t get too caught up in ‘gazing toward the horizon.’ Do the work required to overcome the situation, and then enjoy the peace of mind that you create for yourself by choosing to take action to create your own incredible destiny.
Go with grace, my friends, and never give up your power.
Until next time:
Joshua K. Sigafus