How to be a strong independent woman.
Many women think that they need to do things for other people.
But they don’t have to.
They also feel like they need to explain themselves.
They might feel like they have to explain why they didn’t text back, explain why they wore what they wore, etc.
It doesn’t matter what it is. They feel like they need to explain themselves for other people, or do things to make other people happy.
Well, in this post, I’m going to explain why you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do.
I’m also going to explain how to break out of this cycle of trying to please other people.
Women Are Born Into A World Where Everyone Is Telling Them That They Need To Do Things To Please Other People
For example. If a girl goes on a date with a dude, and she is not enjoying herself, she might still try to act flirty and nice because she doesn’t want to hurt his feelings.
But, in all reality, you shouldn’t do that for somebody else. You need to focus on yourself, first and foremost.
So, if you are on a date, and it’s not working out, don’t try to spend that time anyway, just to make him happy or so you won’t disappoint him.
Just be real.
“Hey, this is going nowhere for me. I’m just not feeling it.”
But so many women feel like they need to make the guy feel good in these situations. You don’t have to be a bitch. But you are not responsible for his happiness or feelings, either.
Many Women Also Feel Like They Need To Please Parents And Other ‘Authority’ Figures
Many women feel like they need to get a certain type of job, or pursue a certain type of career, because their parents want them to.
They may even dress a certain way to avoid confrontations with their parents over how they look.
I’ve even known girls who chose the college they went to based on what their parent’s wanted, because they were so afraid of being a disappointment.
And then, years down the road, these women aren’t happy with their lives or where they are in life.
But here is the simple solution: Don’t do stuff that other people want you to do!
Do what you want, and don’t give in when people want excuses either. You don’t need to explain yourself. You don’t need to ‘explain’ why you want to do what you want to do.
This pertains to parents, boyfriends, husbands… even your friends.
People might not like it when you tell them that you don’t owe them an explanation for not conforming to their standards.
But it doesn’t make you a bad person.
You are not the one in the wrong! They are trying to wiggle their way into your personal business, and they have no rational reason to do that!
Choosing Your Own Path May Require You To Sacrifice – But That Is All Part Of The Game
Not doing things that you don’t want to do is really the first step toward becoming an alpha female – a strong independent woman who minds her business, gets her own money, and pursues her own purpose.
And you may lose opportunities when you start to travel down this path.
In our world, women are expected to be submissive in many ways in life.
They are expected to cater to what other people want. And when you break out of that mold, you may find yourself butting your head against that ‘wall’ as society tries to push back on you.
But the simple truth is this.
The world is full of people who want you, as a woman, to do things for THEM.
The real path to becoming an alpha female, however, is to do what you want to do, and what is best for you and your life.
If doing this means that you miss out on some money, some opportunities, or some relationships, oh well. Embrace that.
You’ll one day realize that those opportunities wouldn’t have been good for you anyway!
Women May Also Feel Pressure From Husbands Or Boyfriends To Act A Certain Way
I’ve had men offer to buy me things if I compromised and behaved the way they wanted me to.
I’ve had my ‘obedience’ purchased with things before. But that wasn’t a life of freedom. That was a life where I wasn’t in control of my own destiny.
Because once you start down this road, you will end up doing things you don’t want to do.
Then, for the next two weeks, you find yourself crying in the shower over something you did, because you gave in and did something that you didn’t really want to do.
But it is up to you to make the choice to stop that cycle in your life.
A lot of women blame men who try to control them, saying that it is the man’s fault. And to a point, it is. It is his fault that he is pressuring you to do something that you don’t want to do.
But if we want to be alpha females, we need to take back that control in our lives, and we need to be responsible for ourselves.
We need to stop playing the victim card, and we need to own our shit.
We need to be boss bitches. Not weak bitches.
And it all starts with saying ‘no’ to things!
Don’t choose to do things just to make other people happy. If you want to do something, do it. If you don’t, say fuck no.
You have zero responsibility to please anyone in this life, unless you want to please them and decide that doing so will actually make you a happier person!
But even then, you need to maintain healthy boundaries. Do not allow yourself to be taken advantage of.
What Does Being An Independent Woman Mean? It Means To Choose Your Own Path In Life
Do what you want to do! When you do what you want to do, you end up taking control of your life.
In my life, when I stopped trying to do what was expected of me, and started actually making an effort to forge my own destiny in life, and to take charge of my own business, money, relationships, etc., I actually, for the very first time, started thriving on my own.
I’m making money doing the things I love. I’m spending time doing the things I love. I’m spending time around positive people who treat me with respect.
And I chose all of it because I decided that I was done trying to conform to other people’s standards.
What Is A Good First-Step In Becoming A Strong Independent Woman?
This is the best piece of advice I have found to be true in my life.
If you want to be a strong, independent woman, do this…
When you wake up in the morning, choose the outfit that YOU want to wear. Do it for you, and nobody else!
If it is PJ pants, if it is shorty-shorts, if it is a dress… whether you are going somewhere, or staying home, etc.
Start with the way you dress. Make that choice for yourself. Wear exactly what you want to wear.
I know that if you dress a certain way, you can get more of this or that kind of attention, etc.
But, if you’re not dressing the way that you want to dress, then you’re not being true to yourself.
It may seem like a little thing that you wouldn’t think is a big deal… but I can tell you from experience that it is a much bigger thing to do for yourself than you might imagine!
For Years, I Compromised On My Clothing Choices For Other People
I did this mostly to please my ex-husband.
I didn’t wear tight shirts, short shorts, or other ‘provocative’ clothing because he didn’t want other men to see me wearing clothes like that.
I wore oversized shirts, just to make him happy!
And in the end, it didn’t matter anyway. It still didn’t work out… and as it stands, all of that effort that I spent trying to please him could have been spent on myself, trying to make me happy!
Wearing the clothes that I want to wear makes me feel good about myself. And at this point in my life, I’ll be damned if any man or boy is going to tell me what to wear!
And it isn’t even about looking ‘hot’ for other people. Sure, it feels good to look hot to the people I’m attracted to. But at the end of the day, it isn’t about that.
It’s about what I think I look like, and how I feel in the clothes I wear!
If clothes accentuate my body the way I want them to… that’s what matters to me.
If you feel good about it, rock it. And don’t let anyone make you feel like you need to change yourself to please them.
Ladies, in the end, you are the one who is with you 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
So make sure that you choose the things that make you happy, that bring you joy, and lead you down the road to becoming a boss bitch.
Of course, navigate these things with compassion and kindness. But keep your boundaries strong at all times. And remember that you don’t owe anyone anything.
Peace out, girl-scout!