I love the science of human mating behavior.
I love studying pickup, how to run game, and dating tips.
I love reading about how humans select mates, interact with each other, and form social dominance hierarchies.
But today, I’m going to tell you the truth about something I’ve been noticing more and more.
The deeper I dive into the science of human mating behavior, the more I come to realize that the answers are already built into us. We just need to unlock them.
Let Me Explain…
Back in 2017, my entire world came crashing down.
My ex-wife and I broke up, and my marriage ended.
I tried like hell to rebound and find someone to date – only to fail miserably.
You see, the simple fact of the matter was that I was just trying too hard!
I was giving off so many low-value markers that I looked like a walking red flag!
I didn’t understand how clingy, desperate, and needy I was acting.
I didn’t understand why I was so unattractive to women.
If you want to get right down to it, it had very little to do with my physical body.
It had very little to do with the fact that I didn’t have any training in pickup or game.
It had very little to do with the fact that I didn’t understand human mating behavior.
It had EVERYTHING to do with the fact that I wasn’t validating myself.
I Was Relying On Another Human To Fix Me
As it was, I was a broken man. I was not a complete person with an awesome life.
I wasn’t minding my business, getting money, and pursuing my purpose.
Instead, I was desperately looking for someone to love me so that I would feel like I was worth something to someone!
But this is exactly what my problem was! I had so little self-belief and self-confidence. Why would anyone want to date me if I was so broken and loved myself so little?
What I Am About To Tell You Is The Number One Thing You Need To Understand To Start Leveling Up Your Dating Life
It doesn’t get any more basic than this.
Step 1: Start minding your business. This means to start taking responsibility for your life. Start living for you, prioritizing yourself, and focusing on putting your life together.
Step 2: Get money. This means to start working and excelling at your work. Get some money coming in!
Then, focus on learning a high-value skill. Mine was freelance writing. Start a side hustle with that skill so that you can take control of your financial destiny and escape your total dependence on the 9 to 5 grind.
As alpha men and women, we must take control of our financial destinies!
Then, work on building a business and/or investments, so that you can earn money while you sleep!
Step 3: Pursue your purpose. Find out what you love and are passionate about, and start pursuing it!
For me, it was dating. I love dating! And as it turns out, I became pretty good at it!
What better thing to focus on than the object of your passion? This is something that I can help other people to get better at, to help them make their lives better.
In doing so, I am making a dent in the universe. I am leaving my mark on the world and creating a lasting legacy of greatness.
I am helping people, and working toward one of my ultimate goals.
Some day, I want to be the most well-known expert on human mating behavior in the world!
Yes, it is a lofty goal. But I have my eyes on the prize, and every day, I’m working toward it.
And that dramatically increases my attraction!
You Don’t Need To Have All 3 Steps Completed To Start Dating
But you DO need to understand that they are important, and be working every day to pursuing them!
You also need to be working on making yourself a better human every day. You need to be leveling up, improving yourself, and improving your life.
Work to make your life so awesome that you literally don’t need anyone else to be happy!
And as a side effect—people will want to join you!
Dating partners will literally line up around the block to get a chance to be included in your amazing life!
That’s The Whole Thing
It is both very complicated and very simple… all at the same time!
Go with grace, my friends, and never give up your power!
Until next time:
Joshua K. Sigafus