Today, we’re going to talk about how to get your girlfriend to keep chasing you after you’ve already gotten together.
This one is mostly for the men out there.
Now, this happens a lot.
You get into a relationship, and then the woman goes from being very excited about you and desiring you very highly, to kind of just being bored—and then maybe she stops chasing you, stops being as interested, and just basically stops being as ‘into you’ as she was when you first met.
And obviously, this is not the way you want it to go.
As a man, you want your girlfriend or wife to stay interested in you.
You want her to stay intensely attracted to you.
You want her to continue to desire you.
So in this post, you’re going to learn not only why this problem happens—but also, how to fix it.
Let’s dive in and discuss it.
Why Did Your Girlfriend Stop Chasing You?
Here’s what you need to know.
The number-one reason for why women get tired of you and stop chasing you in the relationship is because basically the hype and the expectation didn’t live up to the reality.
Women want the men in their lives, the man they love and that they’re in a relationship with, to be better than them.
They want him to be at least a notch higher than her on the value scale.
Why Do Women Want The Man To Be Better?
The reason for this is because women incur a great deal of risk by choosing to give a man sexual access to them.
And so, women want an equal and fair trade-off for the value they’re bringing through their ability to procreate.
Now, at this moment in time, procreation may or may not be on the table in your specific situation. You may not be planning to have kids or anything like that.
However, it’s the instinct behind it that matters.
It’s not necessarily the mechanical process of it that matters. It’s the psychology of it, the instincts pertaining to her feminine value, and how it’s manifested in her instinctual evolutionary evaluation of the situation.
This is what women want. They always want to be with the best man possible—and she must see him as being better than she is, or else she’ll feel like she’s not getting the best deal possible.
This is, at the root core, a survival instinct for women. When they’re with a high-value man, they feel safer and know that their chances of surviving are higher.
And this instinct manifests itself as sexual and/or romantic attraction and desire.
How To Keep Your Girlfriend Chasing You
As a man, there’s really only one way to solve this problem.
And it’s actually really simple, though it isn’t necessarily easy.
You’ve got to be a masculine, effective, formidable, leadership-driven man who is adept at constantly pushing the envelope in his life—becoming better through the process of minding his business, getting his money, pursuing his purpose, leveling up mind, body, and spirit, embracing the alpha mentality, and leaving behind the victim mentality.
This is how you keep your girlfriend chasing you, even after months or even years of being together.
This is how you get your wife to continue wanting you, chasing you, valuing you very highly, etc.
Read this post to gain further clarification on how to become a man of value: How To Be A Man Of Value – 16 Crucial Principles.
A Lot Of Men ‘Give Up’ Their Masculine Journey When They Get With A Woman
They think to themselves:
“Oh, I’ve already won, I’ve scored the prize. She was the prize. Now, I can just kind of relax, play video games, eat junk food, get chubby, stop going to the gym, and just goof off.”
But this isn’t true.
Some men also think:
“Well, I can just kind of settle into a normal life now that I’ve got a girlfriend/wife. I can go to work, come home, engage in my hobbies and escapism, and watch shows, and that’ll be fine.”
But this isn’t the correct mindset either.
(Read this post to learn about the dangers of stagnating in life.)
It Is The Evolutionary Duty Of Men To Always Continue Improving Themselves
As men, it is incumbent upon us to continue to push the envelope.
So in other words, if you make a certain amount of money one year, you should be really thinking to yourself:
“How am I going to get even more money next year?”
And you must be actively engaged in that process, and make sure that you accomplish it.
To learn more about why generating resources (money) is so important for modern men, check out this post: We’re All Hunter-Gatherers In The Sexual Arena.
If you think to yourself:
“I did a pretty good job of organizing my life and managing my affairs this year.”
Well, that’s great.
But then, you definitely also want to be thinking about (and making) improvements for next year as well, so that next year will be even better.
You want to be actively engaged in that process of trying to improve all of the important, fundamental aspects of your life.
This is basically what minding your business means.
Goal Setting Is Also Important
Do you have long-term goals? Do you have short-term goals?
If you’re not writing down your goals every single day, or at least writing them down on a monthly basis—you’re missing a vital part of the puzzle.
Men who don’t write down their goals are men who are not intentionally looking to the future and making plans.
Women want this from men, and for good reason.
These are signals of men who are on their game, who are striving to be powerful, successful, masculine men, and who want to bring the family with them as they succeed.
Women Want Powerful, Leadership-Driven Men
See, she wants to get together with a powerful man who’s going to lead the family to victory.
She doesn’t want to be with a weak man who gives up once it gets with her.
This is often why a lot of women stop chasing men once they get with them.
Now, if the man embraces this alpha mandate, and he becomes a high-value man who’s constantly pushing the envelope to carry the family forward into the future, then he’s gonna remain the kind of man that she wants to chase—that she desires. He’ll continue to be the type of man who excites her.
I wrote an awesome post for The Adult Man that summarizes how to begin this process of becoming a better man. Check it out here: 31 Ways to Become a Better Man Starting Today.
Level Up To Become A True High-Value Man
If you are continually seeking to better yourself (and getting real results with your efforts), you’re going to remain the top man on her radar—because you’re going to always be striving to be the best man in the room.
But you’ve got to be doing those things. You’ve got to be minding your business, and making sure that your affairs are managed better next year than they were this year.
You’ve got to be getting fit and getting into better shape. You’ve got to constantly be asking yourself:
“How can I be in better shape next year than I was this year? How can I increase my workouts, my diet, and my fitness this year? How can I make more money?”
You should always be trying to make more money every single year.
If you’re not successfully executing on this crucial alpha mandate, there’s a problem.
Also, make sure to keep writing out your goals.
These are all very important things.
It’s Also Crucial To Have A Plan For Your Future
- Do have your purpose lined out?
- Do you know what your life’s mission is?
- Do you know where you want to be when you’re 50, 75, or 100 years old?
- Do you know where you’re leading the family, and the probability that you’ll be successful in your journey?
These are such important things.
And if you’re not thinking about these things, then you’re probably dropping the ball as a man.
It’s important to continue to research these things, and to put some serious thought and effort into them.
But this is why women get tired of men, and why they stop chasing their boyfriends.
This is also how men can fix the problem—to become the type of man that a woman truly craves and desires, even for years.
You need to constantly be pushing the envelope—continuing to become the most powerful, formidable man that you can potentially be—the very best version of yourself.
That’s the only way to make it work long term.
But of course, the only way to do it is to get to work.
Alright, this is gonna be it for this one.
Go with grace, my friends. And never give up your power.
Until next time…
Joshua K. Sigafus