How to stop being mentally weak:
To stop being mentally weak, you need to consistently and habitually reframe your mindset using positive, optimistic, powerful, and abundant mindset shifts to change your perspective and persevere through challenges, failures, setbacks, and difficulties. The better you get at making this a habit, the better you’ll get at crushing mental weakness at the source.
Basically, the reason I’m writing this blog post is because I used to be very mentally weak.
But over time, I’ve learned how to cultivate a lot of mental strength for myself.
And this has been incredibly beneficial in all kinds of different ways.
If we don’t cultivate mental strength in life, we’re going to be vulnerable to life’s problems just crushing us emotionally and psychologically when we face hard times.
But as a human, it’s crucial for you to understand that you have the capacity to create whatever destiny you want for yourself.
You have the capacity to create an amazing life.
But in order to create this life, we need to be tough enough mentally, psychologically, and emotionally to overcome all of the challenges and problems that’ll arise—because problems will definitely arise.
And as alpha mentality men and women, we want to be capable of withstanding those challenges and overcoming them to create amazing destinies and legacies for ourselves.
Contrary to what you may believe, you can create a victorious, abundant life for yourself.
You can also fully embrace your alpha potential to realize your most powerful, abundant, successful alpha form.
But in order to do that, you must cultivate some mental toughness.
This is a part of the equation that you just can’t leave out if you want to be successful.
And so, today, we’re going to dive right into it.
These are the 11 steps that I’ve taken in my own life to cultivate mental strength and destroy mental weakness—to get it out of my life and system so that I could start really winning and succeeding at the things I wanted to do.
Okay, so let’s dive into it.
Note: If you’re interested in the content matter of this post, then you’ll definitely be interested in our master guide to leveling up your mind, body, and spirit. Make sure to check that out to get a full rundown of the entire process, from beginning to end, along with a full list of resources and other guides.
11 Steps For How To Stop Being Mentally Weak
1. Embrace The Alpha Mentality
The definition for the alpha mentality is simple:
Being alpha means to take action-oriented, intentional control of your life energy, resources, and strategic trajectory—embracing radical self-responsibility, shirking victim mentality, and determining to utilize your time and resources wisely and proactively to create a meaningful, significant destiny and lasting legacy of greatness in the world.
In short, what this means is to be intentional with your life, to be proactive, to live with purpose, and to wake up every day striving and committed to being the best man or woman in the room.
If you can perform this basic mindset alignment shift, you can cultivate significant mental strength for yourself.
This is the first step.
2. Understand That Life Is A Glorious Opportunity To Create Your Own Destiny
Every day, we should look at our life, our problems, and our situations as opportunities for growth—to overcome challenges and conquer our destinies.
3. Come To Terms With The Fact That None Of Us Are Getting Out Alive
Listen, as far as we know, we only get one chance at this amazing, glorious life.
So we may as well live it fully—embracing all of our strength, creating the destiny we desire, taking the risks we want to take, and using our mental strength to carve out an incredible legacy for ourselves while we have the chance.
We don’t want to cower away from danger.
We don’t want to shrink into the corner, scared and succumbing to fear (like shivering, cowardly rodents).
When we look at the challenges of life, we need to think to ourselves:
“You know what? It’s not like I’m going to live forever. The best way to immortalize my existence is to create an amazing destiny for myself and my tribe, become truly alpha, and rise to the top of the hierarchy—leaving something of value behind that the world will remember me by.”
But the only way we can do this is by cultivating a lot of mental strength.
We have to characterize that as a positive challenge and an opportunity for greatness.
And we have to lean into that mindset and use it as a mechanism to get into the habit of facing those challenges and striving to overcome them—every single day.
4. Deploy Massive Gratitude On A Daily Basis
Every single day is a miraculous gift.
We get to wake up, we get to breathe, we get to eat food, we get to see our loved ones again—these are all good things.
There are many difficulties in life. There are many challenges.
But when we think only about the negatives, this is going to defeat us mentally.
We must set ourselves up for victory by characterizing ourselves as victorious when we first wake up.
Why am I victorious? Because:
- I woke up today!
- I got to breathe today.
- I feel great.
- I’m healthy.
- I have amazing people in my life who I can talk to and interact with.
- I have a warm, dry, comfortable place to sleep and live.
- I have a great job.
- I have a great career.
- My children are healthy.
See, the list goes on and on.
We can all make a long list of things that we can be grateful for.
And if there are things that we can improve on, (which there should be) then we can attack those things with a proactive mindset of victory instead of a victim mentality.
And that’s really what it’s all about.
Gratitude helps to cultivate powerful amounts of mental strength.
5. Intentionally Cultivate Hope And Optimism In Your Life
If you’re constantly looking at the negative side of things—if you’re constantly being a ‘Debbie downer,’ guess what?
Your life is going to feel like a victim mentality existence.
It’s going to feel like a sad, pathetic excuse for a life.
Mentally strong people wake up and embrace optimism.
They embrace hope.
They create hope. They intentionally create optimism by plugging good things into their ears, listening to positivity, looking on the bright side, and looking at the glass half full instead of the glass half empty.
Listen, I know that life is hard.
Hell—the prognosis is always fatal. And sometimes, the seeming ‘futility’ of life and death can be a real existential threat to our mental strength.
But we have the opportunity to make the best life we can possibly make—and to live a hell of a life while we have the chance.
And this is so positive! We should think about this in a positive way.
We can immortalize our existence and our destiny through our contribution to society.
When you cultivate this kind of proactive, positive mindset about your life and circumstances, this is going to make you so much more likely to be able to mentally push through all the difficulties that life will throw at you—because life will throw difficulties at you.
Make no mistake.
You’re going to encounter a lot of danger out there in the world.
But you can overcome that as well.
You can be strong enough to overcome the challenges.
And guess what?
If you’re reading this blog post right now, you’ve already done that—every single day.
You have managed to survive all the bad stuff life has thrown at you thus far, and you can continue to do it.
Not only to survive, but also to thrive.
You can use this positive mindset to strengthen your mind and to continue to conquer your life like a true alpha.
But in order to do this, you must cultivate hope and optimism.
6. Engage In Self-Improvement Every Single Day
Ladies and gentlemen, we must be engaged in the process of leveling up mind, body, and spirit every single day.
There is no substitute for this.
We cannot become mentally strong if we’re physically weak, if our minds are weak, if our souls are weak, etc.
And I don’t just mean you have to get ripped, and become ‘body builder strong.’
I mean strong for you.
Strive to be just 1% better than you were the day before—in your mind, soul, and body.
Make sure that you get adequate sleep. Get your diet dialed in and on point. Make sure that you have a healthy workout routine. Cut out the junk food. Do some praying or meditating. Cut stressful people and situations out of your life.
We must be focused on leveling these things up.
There’s just a point where it’s irresponsible to not prioritize your own health, wellness, peace of mind, and life betterment on a daily basis.
7. Adopt A Life Purpose For Yourself (That’s Bigger Than Just You) And Start Creating It
Do you know what your life purpose is?
If not, then you’re going to suffer from a lack of motivation.
You’re going to suffer from a lack of direction.
You’re going to suffer from the threat of feeling meaningless in your life—because if we don’t have a purpose, we don’t know where we’re going.
We’re like a ship lost and adrift at sea—with no compass, map, or destination.
Eventually, we’re just going to sail around until we run out of food, and then we’re going to starve to death.
And that is NOT the destiny you want for yourself.
It’s crucial to adopt a defined purpose and goal for your life journey.
I’m going to give you an example.
My purpose in life is to become a ripped, attractive, successful, powerful alpha millionaire leader with an amazing dating life and tribe.
And my goal in life is to help other aspiring alphas to master this same journey.
I have a very specific set of goals, and a specific purpose that I want to achieve.
And so—every day, I wake up—and I know exactly what I want to do.
I also have written goals for each one of those items.
- I know how I want my body to look
- I know what I want my financial life to look like
- I know what I want my dating life to look like,
And I take steps every day to get myself to that place.
And guess what?
If you keep working—every single day—you’re going to get there.
But you don’t know what to do if you don’t have a purpose.
So take a minute, figure out what your purpose in life is, and then start heading in that direction.
And you might pivot and shift in your direction as you learn more about yourself and what you actually want—and that’s okay.
Sometimes, your purpose will change over time as you evolve as a person.
This is very normal, but you must start working on this. Identifying your purpose and committing to its achievement can be a massive and valuable source of mental strength, and it can help to transform you from someone who’s mentally weak into someone who’s seriously mentally strong.
Ask yourself what your purpose is, and write it down every single day to help get clarity on it.
8. Write Down Your Goals And Track Your Progress
I’ve already mentioned this once, but it’s definitely worth repeating.
Write down your goals, write down your purpose, and measure your progress every day.
If my goal is to run a marathon—maybe today, I’ll write down that goal.
And then, once I start running, maybe I’ll realize that I can only run 1 mile.
Okay, I write that down.
Tomorrow, I know that if I run 1.1 miles, I’ll be even closer to achieving my goal than I was the day before.
So that becomes my new benchmark.
Then, the next day, maybe I commit to running a mile and a half, etc.
Pretty soon, if I stick with this, I can run a full marathon.
See, that’s just the idea.
We’re not going to achieve everything we want the first time around.
But if we set ourselves up for success by figuring out where we’re at, writing down the goal, and then slowly incrementally making adjustments and tracking our progress—not only will we develop the mental strength to face that challenge and break it down, but we’ll also develop the mental strength required to stay motivated—because we’ll see our progress laid out in front of us.
And this comes from us being disciplined and writing things down.
So when you use this technique, you’ll cultivate greater mental strength for yourself—because you’ll automatically be putting the time and effort it takes into showing yourself that you’re capable of achieving what you want to achieve—and that you’re making progress toward it.
This, in turn, will give you hope, and will help you to be more optimistic. It’ll make you more grateful for the challenges because you’ll see that you’re actually capable of achieving them.
And this will breed new strength inside of you.
This is one of the most powerful ways to defeat your ‘mentally weak’ state of mind and replace it with a state of mind that knows how to break down the challenges and outlast the hardships in life.
9. Enroll In Some Form Of Combat Sports
I don’t care if you’re a man or a woman.
If you want to embrace the alpha mentality in this life, nothing will mentally toughen you like taking part in some brutal, mentally grueling, physically demanding combat sports.
In my specific case, I went to the boxing gym—and it changed my life.
Everyday at the boxing gym, the instructor would make me do these intense exercises—exercise after exercise—and it broke me down physically and mentally.
One day, I just collapsed on the floor.
I was so tired, and I was so exhausted—emotionally, physically, and mentally.
And then, guess what he said?
He didn’t give me pity or let me wallow in my victim mentality.
He didn’t treat me like a little victim.
“We don’t lay down here. Get up and get back to work.”
And you know what?
Some people might frown upon that.
They might say:
“Well, I don’t want to suffer like that.”
But guess what?
When you put yourself through the process of learning a combat sport, not only are you learning to be formidable, but you’re also learning to be strong. You’re learning to be tough.
As a positive side effect, you’re also going to really increase your health and wellness—because you’re going to be working out.
And then, hopefully, you’ll optimize your diet, and you’ll optimize your sleep.
And this will give you so much confidence. It’ll make you feel so much more powerful in your life.
Not only because you’ll have the ability to defend yourself physically—because it’s also so much more than that.
You’ll also have the ability to know:
“I faced this hard workout today, and I conquered it. So I can conquer anything that life may throw at me—anything my boss would throw at me—anything my parents would throw at me—anything my spouse or my partner or my brother or my roommate, etc. may throw at me, I can handle it. Because none of these things will compare to what I deal with every day at the gym when I work hard and achieve those fitness/combat sports objectives.”
And this helps the ‘becoming mentally tough’ part of the equation.
I encourage you to go sign up for some boxing classes, jujitsu, wrestling, or whatever. Just sign up for some kind of combat sport to help toughen you up a little bit and get rid of the ‘mentally weak’ mindset that’s dragging you down in life.
10. Actively Reject The Victim Mentality
We don’t want to live like victims.
We want to be powerful conquerors in this life.
I don’t care if you’re a man or a woman.
I don’t care what your goals are—I don’t care what your purpose is.
Every person is unique.
But this is a universal principle.
We must embrace a conquering alpha mentality—and we must fully reject the victim/beta mentality.
When you start to whine, complain, or feel sorry for yourself—it’s so important that you cut that out and get tougher.
Think to yourself:
“You can do better than this. You can be better and tougher than this.”
Do not succumb to this complaining—this whining and whimpering.
This will only make you weaker.
This is just a victim mentality that gives you permission to cave in to your weakness.
Instead, we have to take those difficult situations—and instead of whining, instead of complaining, you need to say to yourself:
“I need to take action to solve this. And I AM capable of doing that.”
This will help you to overcome challenges in your life to a degree that you likely never would have believed was possible.
And I’m telling you this from experience.
- I used to be the biggest, whiniest little victim on the planet.
- I used to complain about everything.
- I used to believe that everything bad that happened to me was everyone else’s fault.
- I would blame everyone else for all my problems and take zero responsibility for them.
But guess what?
This path only led to misery, low self-esteem, low self-validation, and suffering—not only for me, but also for everyone associated with me.
By contrast—the day I realized I could take responsibility for those problems, the day I realized that I could crush this victim mentality inside of me—and the day I realized that I could become a warrior and a powerful overcoming force of nature in my own right…
The day I realized I could overcome all these problems by embracing the alpha mentality was the day that I stopped complaining and stopped whining.
Instead, I said to myself:
“You know what? There’s no reason to complain or whine. All I need to do to win is find solutions for the problems and deploy them. And if I fail (which I will), then I’ll get back up, dust myself off, learn the lessons, and hit it again. And I’ll keep hitting it until I win. No more victim nonsense. It’s time to get rid of this victim mentality in my mind, and to get to work.”
When you embrace this ‘winner’ mentality within yourself, you’ll notice that you’ll develop your mental capacity for strength to an amazing, significant degree. In fact, this is what I’m talking about when I talk about the hero’s arc.
And this is an amazing way to mentally toughen yourself.
11. Intentionally And Consistently Cultivate Confidence And Self-Validation For Yourself
Listen, the world is full of people who are struggling with self-confidence.
I used to be just like this—and maybe you deal with some of it as well.
Well, there comes a time in your journey when you have to embrace your own ability to create confidence for yourself.
You have to embrace your own self-validation.
You have to validate yourself.
You have to look in the mirror, and say:
“Why do I doubt myself?”
And then, you have to find the problems, and you have to start solving them.
This is both a mechanical process and a mental process.
And you have to realize that there comes a time when it’s actually irresponsible to continue on with a lack of self-confidence.
Because you drastically increase your risk of becoming destructively mentally weak when you fail to validate yourself.
I used to be totally reliant on other people to feel good about myself.
But nowadays, all I have to do is wake up and look in the mirror—and tell myself:
“You’re the king. You’re the conqueror. You’re the warrior. You’re capable of doing anything you set your mind to. You can create whatever destiny you want. And guess what? Even if you get knocked down, you’re gonna get right back up, and you’re going to be undefeatable.”
When I approach myself with that mindset, and when I approach myself with that kind of optimism—and when I pull myself up via my own mechanisms of self-validation and make it real… it’s powerful.
And honestly, that’s what we all need to do if we truly want to overcome mental weakness, develop inner mental strength, and succeed in the world and in our own lives.
Ladies and gentlemen, that’s all I’ve got for this one.
I hope that this has given you some great information that you can use to become mentally tough.
Do not succumb to mental weakness.
You can do better, and I can do better.
We can all become the powerful versions of ourselves that we’re capable of becoming.
We can all create the destinies that we truly desire for ourselves.
Do not allow victim mentality to destroy you, or to destroy your potential.
I believe in you.
So get out there and make it happen.
Go with grace, my friends, and never give up your power.
This is Joshua K. Sigafus signing off.