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Why Do Guys Get Angry Aggressive With Women Over Text

Why Do Guys Get Angry/Aggressive With Women Over Text?

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This post is mostly intended for women. Though men may want to read it as well, to get a bit of insight into the issue. 

Not long ago, a member of my Mastermind Tribe (a lady) had a pretty weird experience where she told a guy via text that she had started seeing someone else, and that she wouldn’t be interested in getting together with him. 

He seemed to get pretty angry, and got a bit aggressive with his tone about it. 

But this isn’t a new occurrence. 

Many of the women I know report this kind of behavior to me, and ask me what possesses men to do this. 

What would possess a man to say something like “fuck you bitch, you’re ugly anyway…” after being told that the lady just wasn’t interested in him?

In this post, I’m going to try to break this down a little bit. 

The Truth Is That There’s No One Single Answer To The Question

The Truth Is That There’s No One Single Answer To The Question

If a guy gets mad at a woman for refusing him, that ‘anger’ may be coming from any number of places. 

  • He may be desperate for attention, and frustrated that he got rejected again
  • He may feel ‘led on’ and angry because the interaction seemed to be successful, then turned unsuccessful
  • He may feel entitled to your attention, body, or sexuality because he has some narcissistic tendencies
  • He may be used to getting his way, and may not know how to deal with being rejected
  • He may be angry, bitter, or hateful toward women in-general, either because of something that happened to him in the past, or because he’s not having the kind of success he hoped for

There are also a ton of other possibilities. 

But at the end of the day, this all boils down to one thing. 

He doesn’t have control over his mental framework regarding women, how to interact with them, how to treat them, and how to understand them. 

In short, he doesn’t understand women, and the resulting frustration is now boiling over to a point where he’s either unable (or unwilling) to control it. 

Now, when I say unable to control it, I’m certainly not trying to imply that this is the woman’s fault. 

It’s not. 

The truth of the matter is this. 

No woman should ever have to be subjected to hateful, angry, or aggressive language from a man. 

But, we also live in an imperfect world. 

And the truth of the matter is that there are men in this world who will act hateful, angry, and aggressive toward women when they don’t get what they want. 

I wouldn’t say that the majority of men act this way. Even the lady who originally sent me the message telling me about this interaction said that this was a rare thing, and that it had only happened twice in her entire dating history. 

But in these cases, we are dealing with men who have gotten so lost that they’ve become ‘bad apples’ on the dating marketplace. 

These types of men may have some good qualities, but they make it impossible for women to engage with them in a healthy way. And thus, they really need to be avoided (and probably blocked) at all costs. 

When A Man Acts Hateful Toward You As A Woman, It Gives You A Glimpse Into How ‘Beta’ And ‘Low Value’ His Mindset Truly Is

When A Man Acts Hateful Toward You As A Woman, It Gives You A Glimpse Into How ‘Beta’ And ‘Low Value’ His Mindset Truly Is

Here’s the truth of the matter. 

An alpha mentality man will never engage in an alpha struggle with a woman.

If she acts inappropriately, disrespectfully, or in any other way that displays that she’s not really what you originally thought she was, the only alpha mentality recourse is to walk away. 

High value men do not allow low value women into their life

And the same is also true for high value women. 

They’ll never allow a man to cross their boundaries and get away with treating them badly. 

As an alpha mentality woman, getting treated this way during a text conversation with a man betrays something that was already at play, and living beneath the surface. 

An air of misogyny and bitterness toward females in general that was never going to be of service or use to you anyway in the goal of securing a high value man as a partner/date. 

And while it’s an unpleasant thing to experience, it’s actually a good thing it came out. 

Because the last thing you would have wanted was to waste your time on this type of man. 

How Do Alpha Men Handle Rejection Via Text?

How Do Alpha Men Handle Rejection Via Text

Alpha mentality men handle rejection by simply wishing you good luck, and disengaging from the conversation.

Here’s an example.  

Her: Hey, I’m sorry, but I’ve started seeing someone. So I’m going to have to cancel our plans for Wednesday. 

Man: Gotcha! No problem. I wish you the best of luck. Take care! Thanks for letting me know. 

See, the thing about this is that high value men understand that women are still women. 

They’re still people. And they still deserve a certain degree of basic human kindness and decency. 

And this matters to the alpha male. Whereas, it actually doesn’t matter as much to beta-mentality men. 

Beta men will be more likely to lash out with their feelings and emotions. 

Why?

Because they give away all of their power in life, and don’t have any control over their feelings, emotions, or reactions. 

They’re not creating their own destiny. They’re reacting to what everyone else is doing. 

Even if a woman acts disrespectfully or immature toward me, that doesn’t give me the right (or the desire) to be angry or aggressive toward her. 

Sure, there are times when women frustrate me. But see, I don’t let those feelings get in the way of being kind. 

So at the worst, if I think that a woman has truly done something that’s out of line, I just disengage and walk away. 

I might even block her if I think that she’ll continue to cause drama for me. 

That’s the alpha way. To walk away from people who aren’t going to be right for you. 

How Can Women Avoid Dating These Hateful, Aggressive Men?

Be constantly on the lookout for red flags that may pop up in your conversations.

(Check out this post for a list of green flag behaviors that men should be exhibiting.)

Is this man being courteous and respectful to you?

Is he showing, through his words and language, that he has a healthy respect for women?

Or, is he showing you subtle signs of misogyny, anger, bitterness, etc.?

Be really aware of these subtle signs, and follow your instincts. They’re often your best tool for weeding out the ‘bad eggs,’ allowing you to focus more on high value men who’ll actually treat you well. 

Sometimes, the most physically attractive men are the worst, because women hate to pass up the opportunity to date someone who seems so cool, successful, handsome, high value, etc. 

But make no mistake. 

No amount of value will make up for a man who has a ‘hate problem’ with women. 

True, no man should be a simp or let a woman walk all over him. 

But responding to a woman’s attempts to do this should not be a bitter or angry affair. 

It should be a measured, firm affair that’s tempered with kindness and respect. 

That’s the difference. 

It really all comes down to respect. 

Conclusion

Hopefully this post has helped you to understand what to do when/if you get those angry, hateful text messages from men in the wake of you rejecting them.

Remember. This type of behavior wasn’t caused by you. 

And it’s bad news. 

Stay away from these types of men. 

They’re not going to bring you any real happiness in life. 

Go with grace, my friends, and never give up your power. 

Until next time…

Joshua K. Sigafus