Why do women hate men?
This is actually a question I’ve heard a lot… and it breaks my heart.
But I also understand it.
There are a lot of men out there who simply feel despised by women.
They feel like feminism has turned women into man-hating creatures. Some men even feel like they are penalized before they even have a chance… all because of what they happened to be born with between their legs.
Well, if you are mystified by this, never fear. In this post, we’re going to talk about it.
(Note: If you struggle a lot with masculinity and are not sure how to come to healthy terms with being a man, you absolutely need to read the book To Be a Man: A Guide to True Masculine Power, by Robert Augustus Masters.
This book literally changed my life, and was responsible for starting me on the course to being an emotionally healthy, powerful, self-sufficient man. Please read it if you have not read it before! It will do a world of good!)
Let’s get down to business.
The Basics: Why Do Women Hate Men (Or At Least Seem To Sometimes)
First of all, I must say something very important.
Not all women hate men.
In fact, most women do not hate men.
9 times out of 10, what you are experiencing when you come across a woman who says that she hates men is a woman who actually, deep within her core, wants very badly to be treated well by a man, but has been very disappointed by them, hurt by them, and probably even abused by them… over and over again in the past.
That’s pretty much the answer.
But it is also not quite as simple as that.
Many Women Have Been Treated Horribly By Men
Why do women hate men? Well, some of them hate men because they have been very hurt by them.
Do you want to hear something very shocking?
“1 out of every 6 American women has been the victim of an attempted or completed rape in her lifetime.”
But when you compare these statistics to those experienced by men, you come up with something that really strikes to the heart of the problem.
“About 3% of American men – or 1 in 33 – have experienced an attempted or completed rape in their lifetime.”
And when you average out all the numbers across the board, you arrive at this statistic.
“1 out of every 10 rape victims are male.”
In other words… about 9 out of 10 rape victims are women. That is quite a disparity… and that is only counting one specific type of violence.
To put it simply… women throughout history have had many good reasons to be angry, fearful, and hateful of men.
Now… a lot of social justice warriors would use this as an opportunity to get up on a soap box and scream at men for how horrible they are for such statistics.
But this is a waste of time, and only makes things worse.
Men are not evil. But evil men perpetrate physical violence more often on women than evil women do on men… or it at least seems that way based on these statistics.
Now, you may not be an evil man. Maybe you have never physically harmed a woman in your life, and would never dream of doing that.
That is awesome. If you’re one of the good guys, rest assured that you are headed in the right direction.
Do you try to protect women and stick up for them? Awesome.
Have you failed at those things in the past, but want to get better at them? That is very commendable. We all make bad choices in life, and choosing to change your behavior is an excellent way to grow as a person and make the world, and your life, better.
Make no mistake – violence against women is truly evil, and goes 100% against the true alpha-male mindset.
But… what if you are a man who truly doesn’t want to hurt women, who in fact wants to be kind and good to women, but still hears women talking all around you about how they hate men and think men are trash?
Let’s talk about this for a minute.
A Lot Of People Are Shaming Men Nowadays Just For Being Men – But You Can’t Let That Get To You
I am amazed at how much man-hating I see on social media these days.
And what is even more amazing to me is that it isn’t all being perpetrated by the women. There are a lot of men who are dissing men as well.
Now, let’s not get too upset too quickly. We must remember that everyone has a right to their own opinions.
But with that being said… this entire discussion makes me profoundly sad.
It makes me sad for men and women. For women because they have been so hurt, but also for men, because it is very difficult for a man to find his way in this world.
It is a big challenge to become the kind of strong man you need to be to survive and thrive in this modern society.
And the last thing we need to do is berate men just for being born men, because some evil men have done some truly evil things.
How To Respond To Man-Haters
The best way to react to the all men are trash posts is to just ignore them. Honestly.
If there are angry men or women posting hateful man-hating stuff on your social media, delete them and stop spending time around them.
They are angry, they are hurt, and they are lashing out at other people because of their trauma.
Men Who Mass-Bash Men Are Also EXTREMELY Beta… And It Shows
It also really goes without saying that bashing all men because some men are evil is 100% a beta male move…
A true alpha male would lift other men up and encourage them, just as he would treat women with kindness and respect.
A true alpha male will also know how to flirt with girls while also respecting them and being kind and respectful. But with that being said, men and women are both sexual creatures… and there is nothing wrong with being a man who enjoys sex with women.
So let’s call a spade a spade. Men who verbally berate other men, either in person or online, just for being men or for pursuing sex in a healthy manner are displaying incredible amounts of beta-male energy.
If you are one of those types of men and are reading this, I implore you to stop the negative talk. Please get in touch with your masculinity in a healthy way, and recognize that you do not need to be ashamed to be a man.
You can be proud to be a man, and you should be.
Also, as an alpha, you need strong people around you who will lift you up and help you to realize your goal of becoming the powerful, capable leader you were born to be.
So get away from all of this negative man-hating talk. That’s step 1.
Step 2 – Always Treat Women (And Men) With Kindness And Respect
Of course, as long as we treat other people with kindness, there will never be a danger of truly becoming the kind of trash that people complain about in men.
And this is very important.
I would truly encourage you to read the Oath of Kings, my alpha-male code that I strive to live by every day.
Meditate on all 18 of the vows, and reflect on your life. Try to grow to become the best, most powerful man you can become.
(You can also read more about my own personal alpha-male journey here.)
Step 3 – Realize That There Are Many Healthy Women In The World Who Do Not Hate Men
I have known some very toxic women who have experienced profoundly terrible trauma at the hands of male abusers.
And some of these women hate men with every ounce of their being… and it shows.
I’ve even dated women like this… women who had been so hurt by men in the past that the darkness of that hated had consumed them.
And these were some of my darkest years. Being with women like this taught me only to hate myself… because the minute they were unhappy with me, for any reason, I was just like the other men who hurt them in the past.
But… I have also known women who have endured truly terrible trauma at the hands of male abusers, and overcame that trauma to have a healthy attitude toward men and other humans in-general.
In fact, some of the most inspiring and wise women I know have been through incredibly terrible things, but refused to allow that darkness to overtake the rest of their lives.
There are plenty of women in the world who have risen above this hurt and hatred… and those are the women you should be seeking out to spend time with.
Step 4 – Realize That It Is Not Easy To Be A Woman
Women are strong… but they are also abused more often than men are.
They are also simply more vulnerable than men are.
This is how it has always been… and it will probably always be that way.
So as powerful alpha males, we need to understand that…
- It is not easy being a woman
- We don’t have to react to the haters
- We can seek out women who are positive
- We can also develop positive attitudes about women, so that we do not perpetuate the negativity and become woman-haters out of bitterness
Some men have been very hurt by women as well.
But on the same side of the coin… we cannot allow that bitterness to turn into darkness.
We need to overcome those things, and stay kind and respectful.
If you need to deal with your anger toward how women have treated you, it is highly advisable to go to a therapist.
It is amazing what a little therapy can do to help a guy get back on track with his emotions!
Therapy should never be seen as a bad thing. It is super-healthy, and every good man should probably see a therapist at least once in a while.
Why Do Women Hate Men – My Final Thoughts
This is not an easy topic to address. And while being a woman is certainly not easy, being a man is definitely no cake-walk either.
But at the end of the day, we can do our best to make the best of our lives, even when things are difficult.
If you find yourself wondering why do women hate men, take a step back and remind yourself that…
- At the core of every woman who hates men is a woman who has been deeply hurt
- You are not responsible for fixing anyone but yourself
- You have every right to stop listening to the negative talk
- You do, however, have every responsibility to level yourself up as a powerful, kind, and respectful alpha male who will not continue the cycle of abuse that so many women have experienced
- You also have a responsibility to maintain healthy boundaries for yourself… so that other humans, male or female, will not be allowed to abuse you
- If you want to attract healthy, high-value women, you must work on yourself and become healthy and high-value as well
- You should never stoop to the level of anger or hate when these negative man-haters get in your social media or in your face. You are an alpha. You must learn to recognize their anger and hate for what it is… the cries of a hurt person who is screaming out for their pain to be healed and taken away, who is so hurt that all of that pain has turned to rage
- You should never take responsibility for something that someone else did. Maybe women have been treated badly by men in the past… but you didn’t do that. Do not hate yourself, or take-on the hated of other people when it is for things that you have not done.
It can be very easy to forget how powerful pain can be. And when we encounter it, we must always respond to it with maturity, wisdom, and compassion. But we must also draw healthy boundaries, ultimately choosing to walk away if the other person will not listen to calm reason and logic.
Returning hate for hate is never the answer.
Men… Do Not Hate Yourselves
One more thing before I finish up this post.
If you are a man who hates men… or more specifically, if you are a man who hates yourself… please, please fix it.
Do not live in an atmosphere of self-hatred.
Men are not evil. Men are not trash. Men are not monsters.
Men are powerful creatures. They are capable of extraordinary things, and they have every right to take pride in their identity as a man, and to celebrate their masculinity for what it is.
There is nothing for you to be ashamed of. You may regret your past misdeeds… but even those can, and should, be buried in the past by choosing to do good deeds from now on.
Do not live in shame. Learn from your mistakes and move on. Shame is not the answer, and living in shame is never the healthy option.
I often like to say that your identity is not who you have been in the past… but who you choose to be today.
Choose to be powerful, capable alpha males today, gentlemen… and if you want to learn more about what the definition of a real man is, check out this post.
That’s all I’ve got for this one.
Leave a comment and let me know what you think!
Go with grace, my friends… and never give up your power.
Until next time…
Joshua K. Sigafus